Inception: A quick review of an exceptionally pointless movie.

Starring Leo & Directed by ‘Dark Knight’ Director, Christoper Nolan

By Andrew Whorehall  |  07.25.2010

 

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Some are seeing Inception 2-3xs already.  Also of interest, some things have changed around the movie theater lately.  Prices for flicks are $5 Monday through Thursday.  There’s a catch if you don’t go one of those days I’ve learned by the new AMC run local Showplace 16 / formerly Keresotes.  Major catches, that $5 deal is a scam.  Wait til you see this math equation that happened tonight going to Inception.

Sunday night.
2 Tickets:  $20.00
2 Large Drinks & a Large Bag o’ Popcorn: $18.25
(Yep, first major difference between AMC & Keresotes.  There is no more Mega-Deal for $11.50.)
Total cost, tax before finding seats and sitting is at the $40.00 ballpark.
…this better be a f*cking fantastic flik because $40.00 for 2 people on a Sunday night wanting to relax by seeing a movie in Rockford, IL is 100% absurd.

Inception starring Leo DiCaprio and directed by Dark Knight director, Christoper Nolan, has everyone raving about dreams and interpretations and levels of dreams, mind reading heists, whatever.  Star Wars on paper looks like Shakespeare compared to this premise.  Nolan apparently has been working on this film, his little ‘baby,’ for years.  It shows (SPOILER ALERT BUT NOT REALLY)- it’s a cinematic disaster with no closure.  Over acting, the entire cast tries to cover loose script ends in psychological reason.  Poor attempts to keep a crowd interested hint at action, sci-fi and romance.  The script is terrible, it tries to explain itself through ensemble moments, and fails.  With every turn, the movie spirals out of control towards an ending that isn’t an ending or is it?  Who cares, I want my money back, my couch and a copy of Tim Meadows’ Ladies Man spinning in the disc player to remind me laughing is always better than wondering when a movie will end.

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Everyone is trying to figure out the meaning to this film- don’t even try, it’s pointless.  The credits could have ran halfway through and it would have had the same meaning as the spinning metal object that ends the film.  It’s a heist by Nolan so poorly performed that it recalls The Sopranos series ending heist that David Chase pulled off.  Chase’s heist was an artistic middle finger open to translation.  Nolan fails.  Here’s an analogy, a poem for the wondering, general public why Inception fails on so many levels that invite cold (below 0°) emotions and meanings.

A meaningless poem about ‘Inception’ and dreams and being hungry and sleeping and still being hungry and dreaming and sleeping and still be ing hungry, infinitely.
by Andrew Whorehall

A man sits in a chair,
he is hungry for pizza.
he is tired,
too tired to get up and find phone—
he falls asleep instead.

The man, in his dreams now, is in the chair still,
he is still hungry,
for pizza.
In his dream he is too tired to get up and find the phone to order a pizza,
accidently he falls asleep again in his dream,
still hungry.

The hungry man in the chair who fell asleep hungry is now in his dreams sleeping in his chair dreaming he has fallen asleep again, hungry still.

Repeat.
Whatever.
No one wakes him up, phone is lost, still hungry, gotta go pee, too tired to pee, still hungry, fall asleep again, repeat.

Add a different sitting chair,
hungry and tired scenes,
like an office chair or lawn chair,
same results,
still falling asleep hungry.
The end.  Or is it, I’m still hungry.
The end.  Repeat.

The ends, infinite.
aW

This analogy makes sense if you see the movie.  I’d venture to say my analogy would make a much better movie. I’m warning you not to see this garbage.  It’s deep and empty— like a perfect ‘paradox.’ A term the characters refer to many times to escape dreams.  An artistic paradox and a foolish one, much like time spent on this review thinking about it.

I left the theater thinking Hugh Grant movies are like Ben Hur compared to these empty mind-f*ck-trick-flicks made by directors that lose their minds;  I believe Nolan has with this film.   I’m not ashamed to admit I enjoy Leo movies though I’ve never seen his most lucrative one, Titanic.  Chances are I will after this just to finally see what the hype was about to comment further on James Cameron’s ego as well.  DiCaprio’s work with Scorsese (til they were forced into Shutter Island by studio heads to make a 4th together) will stand as great American cinema from the 2000s;  especially as ‘Howard Hughes in Scorsese’s biopic masterpiece, The Aviator.  I’ll continue to see the films he partakes in out of entertainment & interest.  His past 2 have been stinkers though.  Shutter Island and now this garbage.

Inception joins the modern day (1990-2010) film stank ranks of;
Romeo & Juliet (Baz Luhrmann’s MTV interpretation of Shakepeare)
Batman & Robin (not even George Clooney as the caped crusader can save director, Joel Schumacher’s, horrid, care bear version of a comic book Fantasia.  I like to call this stinker, Brokeback Batman.)
Shutter Island (The most emotionally & artistically empty big budget studio film Scorsese has made.  It’s a storyline disaster and a blemish on his hall of fame resume.  I selfishly expect so much more out of Marty.)
The Notebook (I can’t even force myself to watch this filth with a girl so she can cry.  Every girl LOVES ‘The Notebook.’  I can’t even act like I care a tiny bit to sit through it just to get laid.  No way, hall of fame foo foo.)

Inception is a foolish movie made by an insane englishman.  Nolan wants to be taken seriously as an artist in the same cinematic regards as Scorsese, P.T. Anderson, David Fincher, Lynch, etc.  It’s not gonna’ happen this way.  The ‘Dark Knight’ hints at such… but not yet, he’s made too many stinkers over the course of his young career unlike the greats in their youth.  Don’t even mention Nolan’s other hits, ‘Memento’- horrible film;  Insomnia, should have titled it ‘narcolepsy’ even with Al Pacino and Robin Williams in it (how do you f*ck that up?  Nolan did.);  don’t forget, The Prestige, whuh?  This guy has made 2 good movies, the recent Batmans and that’s it.  Stick to the caped crusader, Christopher.

I simply want a refund after how much it cost to see this one.
If anyone brings it up to you with questions,did you see Inception?! …Wow, great, right?……what do you think?…
Tell them, I’m hungry, tired, the end.  That’s what I think about it.  Conversation over.  Repeat.

Dear, dear, dear, God,
Inception is worse than The Notebook.

dD  |  andywhorehall.com

Inception: A quick review of an exceptionally pointless movie.Andy Whorehall
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10 comments on "Inception: A quick review of an exceptionally pointless movie."

  1. DD-

    You left out Moulin Rouge on your shitty films list. That is the pinnacle of bad movie-making.

  2. Andrew Whorehall on

    I disagree with that one- 'Nature Boy' towards the end of the movie blew me away. I've watched Rouge a few times enjoying it more so each time. The Wainwrights in the Vaudeville scene are a nice splash of surrealism too.

  3. You shock me, Whore! Are you getting soft? How many times can "Your Song" be sung in a row with conviction? Plus, Nicole Kidman may be the worst actress in the biz today. Poor Ewan. That was a bad choice – akin to Batman and Robin for the otherwise flawless Clooney. However, I will have to track down the Wainwright's scene again. That may deserve another look. By the way, Sockmonkey should shoot for a Blago interview. That could be journalistic dynamite! He is really funny!

  4. Andrew Whorehall on

    Again, you are touching on a soft topic for me-
    I see nothing wrong with what Blago has done.
    At all.
    He is no different than the previous governors of Illinois aside from the hair style and cultural name.
    Had he been born a Smith, Wilson, Anderson, Ryan, I doubt anyone would care.
    It's a credential to be corrupt to be governor of Illinois.
    I see him as a hero if anything and I mean that seriously. Overall, this f*cking country is a joke, this is the same country that allowed 20 years of a Bush involved regime to exist. George Sr. had 12 total, and Jr. had 8. It's all math, we're all doomed, and Illinois is just a puppet for larger problems inside the system.

    Democracy does not exist, nothing is free and he's just a poster boy for them to pin a tail to, to remind us the whole system is garbage.

    I hope he walks away laughing, just like OJ. They should put George Jr. and Dick F*ckhead Cheney on trial if anyone for being CORRUPT for 8 long years I will never forget.

  5. jojowrinkles on

    I really mean it. Blago is very funny. I bet that he'd agree to an interview with you AW. I have to add that it's very funny, now that everyone realizes that the world is not a magical place, that all of a sudden Obama is guilty for Bush's sins. How convenient is that? He's been in office for less than two years and is to blame for the economy, an oil spill, wars, etc – in other words, things that were handed to him as he walked in the door. I'll help explain. It starts with an r and ends with an m.

  6. Matt Youngblood on

    You're wrong, but I'm too tired to tell you why.

  7. Andrew Whorehall on

    You're right, it's a very dumb movie!

  8. It’s September 2011 and I’m coming into this conversation late. Recently, I was on Rotten Tomatoes scrolling through the fans’ banter in the comments section concerning “Inception.” I remember seeing it in the theater and absolutely hating the movie, blasting it on all of the social networking websites only to be met with criticism from my friends and family that loved it. I waited until it was released on DVD so I could give it another whirl. It was still terrible. A movie is supposed to tell a story in pictures, and not force the characters to over-explain what the hell is going on.
    I just wanted to see if anyone out there agreed with me or I was the only one who did not “get it.” I arrived here by googling “Inception was garbage” Voila!

  9. Ray, even a good comic book writer knows they should “show, not tell”. While I enjoyed the movie for what it was, I can definitely see why it has some problems. I hopw you found other cool stuff on our little site 🙂

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